Thursday, March 7, 2013


Today is one of those days. "One of what days?" You ask.
Well that's a silly question and you are silly for thinking it. Stop that.

I have been doing physics homework since eleven this morning and I HAVE to take a break. So I have decided to update the good old mantis blog. I think the last time I did a post was June of 2012! Wowsers I am terrible at this whole blog thing. Anyway better late than never right? Besides I have some really good inspiration for this post.

First off, a comic. Like always.  This time it came from pinterest. And here's a little golden tip for dudes. If you want to know what women want, sign up on pinterest and follow them. In my case you will find that I want a lot of food involving oreos, step-by-step instructions for stuff I will never actually do, ryan gosling, a wedding of some sort, and grumpy cat. WARNING: This comic may or may not have anything to do with the actual topic of this post. But I'm so awesome I'll figure out how to use it as a segway anyway. Watch me.

Pinned Image
AHAHAHA, AHAHAHA, AHAHAHA! < (read that again, except this time say it out-loud and pretend you are the guy on The Princess Bride who laughs a bunch and then falls over dead. Just do it, it will be fun I promise!)

So this morning I didn't need nobody to tell me to wake up! BAM! I actually woke up at a decent hour too. 5:30 am in fact. I'm doing what's called a "Lazy-man Iron Man", which is basically a lazy-man iron man. Oh I see now that I didn't really need to explain that.
Anyway a couple of friends and I have formed an early-morning running group and today we did nearly FIVE MILES!! bow-chika-wow-wow. Of course we had several walking breaks and my knees turned into jello as soon as I got home. Also when I got home I realized that I had forgotten to ask one of my male running friends if I could borrow a wrench to install a super girly basket on my new bike! Because, of course, all real men have wrenches. So I texted him and he was perfectly willing to come over and help me install the basket with his awesomely manly wrench. Except the basket didn't fit my bike so I'll be taking it back to Walmart tomorrow. boo

Schwinn Delmar Lady's Collapsible Bike Handlebar Basket
Do not buy this! It will RUIN YOUR LIFE!!! AHHHHH
After my friend left, I got a really sweet text message from another manly male friend, and THEN ANOTHER manly male friend called and asked me on a date! holy crap! What's with all this manliness coming my way?

If this keeps up I might be forced to start doing really feminine things, like wearing ruffles, matching my underwear, getting my nails done, and pretending I don't know how to use a fly-swatter! That'll be the day. "What will be the day?" you ask. Stop asking silly questions, I'm getting sick of it

As this was happening, I muttered under my breath quite mutteringly the following sentence, "Man, somebody must have found my "manly things that mature manly men do that make me think they are much more manly, mature, and marriageable" list and published it on the internet. naw probably not." but then I thought, "hey, what a GREAT IDEA!"


1. Being male
2. Liking girls
3. Grilling meat
4. Giving me a compliment
5. Holding a current Temple recommend (and going)
6. Giving service
7. Doing your home teaching
8. Asking a girl, any girl, out on a date.
9. Asking ME out on a date! +50
10. Holding a baby
11. Lifting heavy things
12. Opening jars
13. Using a wrench
14. Using a wrench to fix something specifically for me :)
15. Using a wrench, shirtless, to fix something for me  :) +50
16. Starting a fire with a bow drill
17. Holding my hand
18. Talking about the gospel
19. Picking up trash, or taking out MY trash
20. Crying. Not because Bella chose Edward instead of Jacob. Rather, because Bertier gets hurt in Remember the Titans or because your Grandma passed away :(
21. Getting something for me off the top shelf (this doesn't happen much because I can usually get everything off the top shelf. but if by rare occurrence it does, you may give yourself fifty bonus manly points)
22. Building a shelter
23. Shooting a gun
24. Offering to give me a ride somewhere
25. Liking Harry Potter (Lord of the Rings and Star Wars MAY also be applicable here but it depends. You'll have to ask for more clarification if you really want to know)
26. Playing the guitar
27. Choosing to play old-school rock or country on the guitar rather than Jason Mraz to win me over. I'm thinking, any song featured on guitar hero, or any song by billy joel, Boston, Aerosmith, Pink Floyd, garth brooks, josh turner, keith urban, the Eagles, etc. "Why?"  you ask. Yet again, another silly question. If you really want to know go have my brother and my dad play the guitar for you and you'll see why.
28. Doing stuff for your mom
29. Making little kids giggle
30. Making me giggle
31. Making my dad giggle...???
32. Treating all girls with respect, kindness, and friendliness, whether you like them or not
33. Placing your hand on the small of my back as we walk through a crowd of people :)
34. Being humble
35. Being confident
36. Being humble, yet confident (you see what I did there??)
37. Reading the scriptures out loud in a manly vocie :)
38. Possessing a manly voice
39. Singing to elderly people
40. Singing in church even if you're bad at it
41. Quoting Monty Python
42. Speaking a foreign language
44. Having callussed hands
45. Smiling
46. Being really bad at writing poetry
47. Carrying my groceries or doing my dishes
48. Knowing a lot about something you like
49. Leaving my apartment before midnight without me asking
50. Being goofy and laughing at yourself
51. Being complete without me, but even better WITH me :)

Ladies, please comment with your additions. I'd love to know what manly things mature manly men do for you that make you think they are more mature, manly, and marriageable.